Here's my sweet innocent baby boy on the day he arrived:
Here's my baby boy during his Preschool Field trip last week to the Butterfly House in St Louis.
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Punishment???
I have a question for parents out there and hope that someone can give me some ideas.... Prior to our 4 year old son starting preschool last fall, he was a good boy that hardly ever got into any kind of trouble. After he started preschool it's like you switched a switch....he is like night and day. The kids have a daily folder that the teacher sends home with the kids each day. Included in this folder are papers that are to stay at home, papers that need to be returned to school and a paper that has each day of the week written on it with notes from the teachers for each day. Those notes can be a simple smiley face, straight face, frowny face with an explanation as to why they child got the straight or frowny face. The first few weeks were tough, so the frownies for not staying in a straight line or sitting still during carpet time I didn't pay much attention to. Going to school was a new adventure for a child that was use to staying with grandpa and grandma while me and his father worked. After about the first month of school Gibson was getting smiley faces "almost" every day, there were some exception but he is a boy. Boy's will be boy's....hasn't someone said that before? Every day a frowny or straight face came home we would discuss with him why he got in trouble and explain to him why he couldn't do what ever the reason he had gotten that frowny or straight face for. Well EVERY day last week we got frowny or straight faces. He was doing things like acting up at the lunch table, not sitting still during carpet/story time, talking when he was to be listening, him and some friends pretending to playing guns with there fingers, and him and his friends shoving back and forth. How do you punish a child for doing these types of things? After all he is only 4 and yes ALL boy but all of this behavior didn't start until he started preschool. What happened to my sweet, kind, kid that rarely got into any trouble? I've talked to the teacher about his behavior because even this behavior has followed him home. The teacher told me that this is the worse school year that she has had in her teaching career. The kids WILL NOT listen and that has worn off on Gibson because he sees others acting that way. I do not want my child to be a bad kid, nor is this the way that we have taught him to act. But, on the same hand, I do not want him to let other kids walk all over him. If shoving is in self defense then, go for it. I'm lost on what to do. I have another child that is to start preschool this fall and I DO NOT want this same behavior to rub off on her. I'm open for any suggestions that my blogger friends may have.....HELP! What should we do? I'm starting to see just why some parents choose to home school their children. WHEW it wears this Mommy out!
Here's my sweet innocent baby boy on the day he arrived:
Here's my baby boy during his Preschool Field trip last week to the Butterfly House in St Louis.
Here's my sweet innocent baby boy on the day he arrived:
Here's my baby boy during his Preschool Field trip last week to the Butterfly House in St Louis.
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5 comments:
Gibson reminds me of my oldest grandson, who lived with us for the first four years of his life. It was tough on him when his mom got married and he no longer had the undivided attention of grandma and grandpa - and he started acting out.
When my daughter called in desperation, my advise to her was to not punish the bad - talk about it, but don't punish. He was wanting attention. Rather than dwell on the bad, she rewarded the good. It worked for her. Of course as he grew older, she had to punish misbehavior! It just seems when there is such a drastic change, it is the child trying to find his niche or just figuring things out. I'll bet you next year will be a whole different story. Hang in there!
I agree with Deanna - reward the good! Devise some kind of "treasure chest". Start easy, say a smiley face gets a treat. When you see that he is getting one every day, change it up. 3 days in a row gets ice cream with mom etc. I personally find that everyone else does a good enough job telling my kid(s) what they do wrong and not enough time telling them what they have done right.
We do not take bad behavior at school lightly. If the system the teacher is using is not working, we will start to punish the child at home. No video games, tv, computer etc. You have to take away what 'hurts' the most. When they whine and complain about it, they are reminded from us why they aren't allowed to have that privilege. I always try to remind them last thing in the morning of the behavior I expect from them. Some may disagree, but I feel like 4-5 is absolutely old enough to understand rules and consequences. Good luck Joyce, this parenting gig sure isn't easy most times is it?
As a Mom of 5 grown ones and 7 grands, I have seen this more than once. Be sure that you give him lots of praise for his GOOD behavior at school and at home. Let him know that he's a big boy,so he's allowed to go school, but that there are rules, just like there are at home. My thought is that he's now facing a new set of rules, and that he's not quite sure how to deal with them. Let him know that you are so proud of him for being such a good boy at home, and you want his teacher to be proud of him too.
He may be overwhelmed in a large group...
By the way, thank you for stopping by to visit! It's always good to meet a new friend!
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